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the-lone-contractor
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n/a, Female
Location:
Location not disclosed
Joined:
5/13/07
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Alone against the forces of abject stupidity stands the Lone Contractor, toy guns in hand and at the ready.

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Level 12 Blank Slate
Normal Whistle
Ranked as Civilian

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I have learned that for some reason, it has become A Thing on the internet to describe things with the simple, single word "beast." At first I just assumed people couldn't spell "best" correctly, but it's becoming apparent that they really just mean "beast."

"The Lone Contractor kicks lots of ass at grenade golf" becomes "Contractor is beast." (Note: I do kick an exceptional amount of ass when you combine golf with live grenades. Interestingly, this game is best played with shovels - I use a vintage WWII trench shovel myself - and naturally it's better if you use people you really don't like as targets, as it can get messy.)

"Beast" is not a fucking adjective, in much the same way that "office" is not a verb and "commute" is not a noun. "Beast" is a noun. You can call something a beast - like "this game is a beast" (whatever the hell that means) and you can modify "beast" into the adjective "bestial" or if you find that you must, "beastly" is also an adjective meaning basically the same damn thing as "bestial" but it makes you sound more British.

I think this trend was born on YouTube, which makes it even more retarded.

Beast: it's not a goddamn adjective.

Tell your friends.

"Beast."


Recent Game Medals

Pinball 50 Points Do a 3 hits vehicle collision combo Medal Stats.
Gun Slinger 25 Points Weaken a hood grappling zombie with 1 weapon, then quickly switch to another weapon to finish it off with one shot Medal Stats.
Beardy Basher 10 Points 01 - Defeat Beardy Barrel Medal Stats.
Ironic 10 Points 01 - Hit beardy barrel with a barrel Medal Stats.
Waste Not 10 Points 01 - Throw kid body Medal Stats.
Child Chomper 5 Points 01 - Eat kid Medal Stats.
Run Abobo, Run! 5 Points 01 - Execute a dash move (shoulder block or jump kick) Medal Stats.
Poor Aboboy 10 Points 00D - Watch the whole intro where Aboboy is kidnapped Medal Stats.
Patience 10 Points 00A - Watch full intro rising up to main menu Medal Stats.
Mutation 10 Points Complete all 6 endings Medal Stats.


Total Medals Earned: 315 (From 34 different games.)